At 7:00pm tonight, Dexter POOPED ON THE TOILET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  (for all grammar nazi’s out there, it might be more accurate to say he pooped whilst sitting on the toilet, or even, he pooped into the toilet – but seriously, we’re talking about feces here, how much does good grammar help us? -joel)

The rest of the world may be celebrating the royal wedding, but here in Everett, we are celebrating the fact that Dexter finally got Henry.  Confused?  Last month, when Nicky had his big poop – he got Harvey the train.  Henry was promised that same night to Dexter.  It’s been quite the wait but Dexter is now playing with his beloved Henry.

OK – let me set the stage.  I gave Annie an ultimatum – you cannot leave the country until Dexter had pooped on the toilet.  When I got home from work today, I asked “Annie – did you complete your mission?” to which she responded “no”.  Needless to say, I was slightly concerned that Annie might miss her flight the next morning.

Fast forward to 6:40pm.  I’m upstairs, taking care of my abused nose.  I hear Joel promise Nicky a piece of chocolate if he would sit on the toilet.  As I walk downstairs, I hear them enter the bathroom.  I walk over to Dexter.  He looks at me weirdly.  Hmmmm.  “Hey Dexter, are you poopy?” and I peak into his diaper.  Oh - a little rabbit pellet turd.  Signs of a big poop to come????  “Dex – let’s go sit on the potty.”  Dexter says “Three more minutes.”  Yep - that’s code for he’s going to poop.  Now I have to get him on that toilet!  I run to the chocolate, yelling over my shoulder, “I’ll give you a big chocolate egg for sitting on the toilet” and don’t wait for a response.  I grab two little chocolate kisses, snag Dexter outside the bathroom.  Nicholas is already set up on the big toilet so Dexter gets a little one.  He wiggles all over that toilet.  Five minutes later, Nicholas has pooped in the big toilet and shouts to Daddy “Daddy, you get me my new car.”  It is a statement, not a question.  He repeats himself.  Joel answers, “Okay, Nicky” and brings him a new matchbox car.

Nicholas is ushered out of the bathroom and I move Dexter up to the big toilet.  I try reading him a book.  He’s playing with a tractor / trailer combo + 2 cows on a TV tray we have pulled up to the toilet.  He keeps asking me questions.  After what seems to be forever (probably 5 – 10 minutes), I’ve basically given up thinking Dexter is going to finally poop and just sit and stare at him.  All of a sudden, he stops playing with his toys, looks me in the eyes, starts to grin and says “I pooped” triumphantly.  I hear a little splash.  My eyes go wide.  Dexter has the biggest smile on his face now.  We both yell for Daddy.  Nicky and Daddy run into the room.  We all look at the poop.  Dexter asked for his car.  Joel runs from the bathroom and brings back Henry and a car.  It is a fantastic moment.

and while Katie was up stairs writing this down, I watched Dex and Nic playing with their trains.  Nic had his new car upside down on a freight card (much more stable that way – what a little engineer), while Dex was roaring around the track with Henry (ably assissted by Arthur and Thomas).  Dex came up to where Toby was waiting on the track – Toby is a tram engine, and he was pulling Molly (a steam engine), a zoo car with a giraffe inside, Duncan (another steamie who like’s to Rock and Roll too much and often gets into trouble), and the aforementioned Harvey (a combination steam engine / crane). 

So Dex rolls Henry up to Toby and starts yelling, “I Henry.  You in my way.  I Henry.  You get outta my way.  I biff you.  Biff, biff, biff, biff, BIFF!”  Biffing and bashings is when trains knock into each other.  Dexter was yelling this while he was slamming Henry repeatedly into Toby and his train, knocking all of them off the train track.  The he yells, “I Henry, I biff you off the track!  You outta my way!  I Henry!”

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